ALOHA!!!!!!

Made it to the Big Island this year, seriously, what is not to love? Stories of the adventure will make their way onto this page in the next couple of days, but right now, thanks to some funky food Serene and I had for lunch I must dash to the loo. Oooh!

Common Cold Conclusion

I fell, fell into the gooey vat of too much snot armed only with an almost never ending supply of tissues (now with aloe!), sugar free throat drops, maximum strength, fast-max dextromethrophan HBr - cough suppressant and packets of that fizzy medicine potion that would surely give Professor Snape a case of cauldron envy. My body is under severe medication and thinking about the next round of dosing makes my innards churn and protest. So much so, that I dare not feed it anything too solid, a piece of bread here, a strawberry and raspberry smoothie there, maybe some of that decadent ginger cake the husband made. Mmmmm...cake...yeah, still say that. The first symptoms manifested as feelings of dizziness and chills, it was around 3am so I didn't get out of bed to counter attack, I know, total blow it! I went to work and made it through the entire day not feeling too badly and consumed about 4 packets of wondrous Emergen-C. Unfortunatley, the virus, bug, common cold, evil green slimy microbe had already taken hold and 10 pm called for something stronger than pumped up kool-aid, so I popped some nighttime nyquil and went to bed. Next day I felt as if I had the mumps or fought a pretty decent round in my sleep! My jaw was sore and my head felt full of everything except what it's supposed to be filled with (wildly creative ideas, the solution to global warming, the soft kitty song), the chills weren't letting go and my body thought that sweating simultaneously would make me feel really pretty so it went with that. Boy, work was going to be fun! I lasted 5 hours, after that I carefully drove home, took a shower, put on my PJs and got into bed. The next 4 days were spent either asleep under many blankets or wrapped up in my snuggie on the couch. The moments of consciousness were filled with alternating between the cough syrup and the hot fizzy flu potion both which were only used to facilitate sleep as I've concluded this time (and many times before) that the ONLY cure for the common cold is sleep. Get it however you can and as often as you can, otherwise you're doomed to stay in that gooey vat of too much snot much longer than you and your poor body has to. Bottom line: call in sick and get some sleep!

Head in a fog

Yes, quite literally! Yesterday the fog bank did a nose dive into my neighborhood and this is the P.O.V from my steering wheel. It cleared up once I passed Presidio so that was fine. I didn't want to have to drive to work next people who would probably be losing their minds over the nearly zero visibility. Today? Sunny, baby, sunny.

Whole lot of Crazy Going on!

Got an email out of the blue from someone who is absolutely bonkers. I had put some distance between us about a month ago because everything was pointing towards a friendship that was very toxic and unfulfilling. The red flags went up so I stepped back. Let me say this, however, I did offer to help this person move into a new place but was ignored, so at that point I assumed we had said our last good-byes without really saying anything and I was o.k. with that. I knew I was going to have to remove myself from this friendship and better it go quietly into the ether than have a dragged out, finger pointing, name calling confrontation...or so I thought. Today, after about 30 days of silence, the crazy came crashing down in an email and wow, did it solidify my decision to step back. Step back? I'm locking the doors and shutting the curtains, lights are out and nobody is home!
Background to the present, abridged because otherwise we'd be here for days!
Ok - Ahi te va en inglés: I have known this woman for a very long time but we were never close until this year. She was having problems at home (with her boyfriend of 17 years) so I tried to help her. At the same time she was flirting with a guy from Los Angeles (E) that she met on Facebook and she told me she wanted to sleep with him. She is 38 years old and she began acting like a crazy 16 year old! One day she would tell me that she spent all day, in bed, crying over E (whom she had NEVER met in person or spoken to) and that she felt like she was losing her mind. The next day she would tell me that she was only kidding and that I shouldn't take it too seriously!! WHAT?? When one of my friends is hurting I try to help, I try to give them good advice, I fight for them. When she would tell me that E would insult her and put her down I would respond with "unfriend him", "you don't need a man that puts you down, you need a man that flatters you and is kind to you". Pero NO, aparentemente le encanta ser abusada! En fin, I got tired of trying to make her see how toxic E is so I told her NOT to talk to me about him anymore. Bueno. She was in the middle of moving from her house that she had bought with her ex-boyfriend (D) to an apartment and I told her to let me know if she needed help moving, she never answered me. A few days later I asked her when I could come and see her new place and she said that she hadn't moved in yet. Nothing followed for weeks and weeks. Then yesterday I get her crazy email that said: "You really think this was all worth never speaking with a friend again? Seriously? I never did anything wrong to you, don't even answer this because you walked out on me when I most needed a friend."
Claro que le contesté, pero su recoleccion sobre los hechos esta muy equivocada. There were about 5 emails that went back and forth, finally she said that she was having sex with E now and that was what she needed, that he is the best therapy for her! LOCA!! I just answered with "Whatever makes you happy." I thought that was the end of it but she sent me another accusatory text last night and there are 2 emails in my yahoo account that I haven't opened. I think she really has some mental issues, I know she's not eating well, she doesn't have a job, she's super paranoid…so she has all this time to focus on this and disrupt my life. He tomado precauciones en contra suya, ya he consultado con mis brujitas y tenemos un plan. I just want her to leave me alone!

Space Flowers at Trader Joe's

Apparently a seedling found it's way from the farthest reaches of the universe and took root on Masonic Avenue. Beautiful spacy looking flower, enjoy!

Bloomin' Haight

During one of the breaks from the San Francisco Ghost Hunter Society's lecture, I took a walk up to Haight Street, and on the way to a very cool store called Reincarnation I ran into a beautiful container garden on the sidewalk. This is a shot of one of the vibrant flowers adorning the neighborhood. Flower Power indeed!

What I Want from my IT Department

I want you to stop with your double talk tech bullshit like "Did you make sure you're using the DHCP server and that the subnet mask is 345.456.678.90? Because if it isn't then the IPv9 can't be configured." What? What? What? Look, I don't expect YOU to know how to run a PubMed search, find the PMCID number (or if it's not there, request it from the NIH) and create an EndNote library from the information gathered. So don't expect me to shout "EUREKA! You were so fucking helpful, why didn't I think of that?" (Helpful Hint: Please visualize Lewis Black, finger pointing in frustration, head almost exploding due to the mind numbing tech head games.)

I want you to take responsibility for my problem and the subsequent resolution and not pass me from one IT person to the next while trying desperately to remain anonymous. It wasn't cute when I asked (via email because heaven forbid I have the honor of talking to anyone of you live) "Who am I emailing with?" and the response was "The (no) HelpDesk - smiley face." Oh no, you didn't just end your smartass email with an effin-smiley-effin-face!

I want you to say “You know? I don’t know how to solve that but let me do some research and I’ll get back to you.” Not say “Turn off your computer for 30 seconds and restart it, if that doesn’t work get back to me.” Only I can’t because I DON’T KNOW WHO YOU ARE, YOU DICK!

I want you to be able to support the software that the company has approved for use and not send me outside Internet links that you’ve come across only seconds earlier as a direct result of my question. Sending me outside Internet links to fix a problem you have no idea how to is not a valid or helpful solution because I can easily Google “How do I fix this shit?”

I want you to understand why I lose my mind on hold after being shuffled from person to person, I want some empathy when I start foaming at the mouth because multiple tech people refuse to take on a sense of urgency when it comes to my asking for help. I want you to have a thicker skin when I crumble and call one of you on the carpet instead of becoming effin offended at my indignant email finger pointing. But NOOOOO, I have to apologize for being angry at your lack of support, for your anonymous abuse, for your heavy breathing over the phone (on the rare occasion I get one of you on the damn phone) and for expecting decent service from the department that works for the same goddamn company I do. I mean it’s not like these are faceless people, I do see them huddled in their dark offices, monitors emitting an incessant blue glow, Red Bull ivs hooked up to cringingly pale arms, bizarre mobiles dancing overhead, geek conversion chart tacked to the wall…and a name tag that reads “HelpDesk, smiley face.”